The previous blog post discussed how our own personal non-negotiables can be used to provide the basis of our routine. Providing foundations that allow us to build the rest of our day around in order to complete the tasks, jobs, or errands we want to complete or achieve that day. But as we all know, creating the routine is the easy part, sticking to it is the real challenge.
Lally et al (2009), found that although there is a lot of variation, forming a habit, such as running for 15 minutes or eating fruit at lunch, took an average of 66 days to become a habit. The accuracy of this isn’t particularly important because every single person reading this is an individual. There is no way that we can identify how long a new habit that you have chosen will take to become your new habit. What we can take away is that it probably isn’t going to be a quick fix. That wanting to do it or knowing that it is good for us, may not necessarily be a strong enough stimulus to guarantee application, execution, and/or completion.
So how do we create a new habit, stick to our routine, or maintain our progress? There are heaps of techniques that can be used and the proof of this is the number of books and studies that are at our fingertips. The tools are at our disposal, yet not many of us (myself very much included) manage to successfully and consistently keep to the routine we set ourselves. There is always a reason why it didn't work. Maybe we just need a stronger reason as to why we want to stick to it? Or could it be that we have all the tools, we just don't know how to use them? Or better yet, maybe we have simply failed to identify what works for us and during what circumstances is it effective for us.
Below are just a few of the techniques I have used, culminating in the one I have found most useful for me, as well as the reasons why and when they work for me.
Setting ourselves a goal is a very common one, whether it be lifting a certain weight in the gym or losing a certain amount of weight. Some people are so goal-orientated that if they set their mind to the goal, “I’m going to lose a stone”, you will be amazed at how their tunnel vision and dedication take them to where they want to go. I can use this technique if I set myself an end goal such as a competition. For example, having entered a swimming-based race called Neptune steps I found myself naturally dedicating more time to the pool. The reason goal setting worked for me, in this case, was that the end date was set. I knew that come the 22nd of March I had to be ready.
A change in the factors surrounding the goal though and the technique does not necessarily have the same outcome. Targeting the release of a blog post by saying to myself "it needs to be ready by Friday at noon. Well does it? No actually. I can move that date forward because it is only me that it refers to. Therefore, I know that goal setting will work when the end goal is out with my control. When there is no other option than to be ready for that date.
Even bad habits provide a reward. Sure, when we complete a task there is a feeling of reward. However, postponing a task is effectively allowing yourself more time where you do not need to worry about completing that task. That in itself is an award. It is why we often procrastinate. Giving ourselves permission not to do something for the next 5 minutes while we scroll Instagram is a short-term reward rather than remembering how good we will feel upon completion of the task. It is the same with weight loss. Treating ourselves to a donut is the equivalent of procrastination. The temptation of an instantaneous reward simply beats the long-term reward we may receive when our long-term goal to be visually and mentally happier with our physical appearance.
It is useful to even just be aware of this mechanism, using it to our advantage. Reminding ourselves that this short-term reward is not going to feel nearly as good as the long-term reward. However, it is also important to reward ourselves throughout the process because although we may not be at the end goal just yet. We are better than we were the previous day, or the previous week, or the previous year.
Science or no science, we tend to find it easier to let ourselves down. Working as a team provides accountability, but why is this the case? In my opinion, cognitive dissonance may play a part in this. Cognitive dissonance refers to when our ideas, beliefs or behaviours contradict each other. A great example of this comes from an article on the Psychology Today website. An individual who views himself as honest will experience cognitive dissonance when they lie. The behaviour that is lying, contradicts the individual’s belief that they are an honest person.
We can modify this to our own benefit. If we understand what beliefs, we have of ourselves. For example, if we believe ourselves to be a reliable person, a good friend, polite, thoughtful, or maybe even simply someone who puts others first. If we then arrange to meet someone, say, at the gym at 7 am before work. We may be more likely to be there because it is no longer just about us. We are no longer just letting ourselves down but someone else. Someone who may be counting on us as their source of motivation to get out of bed in the morning in order to complete that training session.
The same can be applied for your work if sitting down to emails or picking up where you left off with a report from the following day is not enough to enthuse you into working at 9 am on the button. Schedule that meeting for 9 am and potentially gain some momentum. By the time the call ends there will have been some form of productivity that can be carried forward into the tasks that follow.
There is however one important fact from the Lally et al (2009) study that I have delayed mentioning. The study found that in the process of developing a habit, missing the odd day does not halt or ruin the formation of a habit. So as we all go through this process it is important to remember there will be days where the alarm clock gets snoozed, we snack on crisps or chocolate instead of the fruit we were supposed to have, we don’t upload that blog post because we hadn’t stuck to our routine and felt like a massive hypocrite for posting as we do not deem ourselves to be “practicing what we preach”.
The important thing is that we don’t let bad days turn into bad weeks or bad weeks turn into bad months. It may be easier said than done but we have to accept that we will not stick to our routine to the letter. That there will be days that we get literally nothing done. But instead of beating ourselves up over it, we embrace it. In the same way that bodybuilders may use a cheat day to also benefit a lagging body part. Maybe we need to use the days and moments we fail to stick to our ideals as a chance to recover and recuperate so that we can go again. Working towards the long-term. Rather than breaking down completely in the short-term.
I would love to know your thoughts on this post so please feel free to comment below or even message me directly. I hope this has helped.
Cheers,
Lee
References
Lally, P., van Jaarsveld, Cornelia. H. M., Potts, Henry. W. W., & Wardle, J. (2009). How are habits formed: Modelling habit formation in the real world. European Journal of Social Psychology.
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